The power to fly but only when touching the ground

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The power to levitate a lamp 4 inches off the ground... Once...

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The power to turn a brainfart into a fart

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The ability to talk to bacteria

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The power to rotten food.

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The power to smell poop

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The power to control unsalted butter very slightly with huge amounts Of effort

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The ability to predict what will appear on ReCaptcha, SOLVEmedia, and all that stuff, before you see it.

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The power to realize that I am starting to sound (and type) more and more like Salvador Dali, and being proud because the man was a genius, the most fantastic thing he could do every morning, was to wake up with a person as fantastic as himself! And while he indeed walked a different path than most do, no one can deny his footprints are clearer than most... Perfection? A losers wish... to be outstanding... is a gift on its own. Moral: Yeah many of you see this as pointless, so I thought I could just as well add it. While I dream of the age where people stop looking for Gods and strengthen the most powerful tool in the universe: YOU.

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The power to see women naked, but only when they're your friend's mom.

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The ability to get free housing for at least 25 years after running over your neighbor.

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the ability to an app cost 1 cent less (no free apps don't count

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Radiation resistance inversely proportional to the amount of radiation around you.

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the power to die at will

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The ability to smell colors.

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The power to talk to animals and plants, but only to have really boring conversations with them.

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The power to turn any drink into pee.

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The power to have anything in the world you will never ever need in your life

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The power to delete the "missing a finger" comment on shitbrix.com.

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The power to walk into Mordor.

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The ability to revert any computer to windows vista. Works best on Linux operating systems.

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The ability to read minds by absorbing their mental disorders

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The power to use a ridiculous signature that kills any chance of receving green thumbs. Moral: What you talking bout foo?

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The power to live through a Twilight movie.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!