The ability to float sideways very slowly

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The power to think of a useless superpower, but start typing and forg........ GOD DAMMIT!

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The power to do anything else but worship me. Moral: I DEMAND SATISFACTION! I mean I dont need it, I just want you to do something useful with your life for once... That practically makes me into a saint... Aww.... Steve Jobs No More... LOOOOOOOLLLIPOP!

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The power to levitate mustard.

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to drink alot of alcohol and not get drunk

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the power to not fall in love with someone while you're dating someone else.

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(PS: Neo was the seventh Jesus, we live in the matrix)

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The power to produce fingernails at will that people can eat.

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The power to increase the rate of plant and fungal matter growth by 15% by staring intently at it.

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a healing factor that can heal paper cuts in 2hours

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The power to sign every comment - Some douche (Scott?)

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The Ability to read another's mind, After insightfully asking them what they are thinking.

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The power to stare directly at the sun

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thee power to not eat but still starve

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the power to speak fluent clingon, but only to the non-metally disabled

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The power to understand the purpose of life, and every other world mystery, exactly .5 of a second before you die.

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The power to circumcise yourself

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The power to correct spelling mistakes on road signs

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The power to change colors to the excact same as before.

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The ability to morph into someone else's left butt cheek

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The power to buy "I cant believe its not butter" and turn the damn thing into real butter.

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The power to laugh so hard you can't breath at "Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?" Jokes.

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The power to hold the floor down using gravity.

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The power to no sweat in the cold.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!