The power to poop without wiping

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the power to pee while brushing your teeth

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The ability to speak all languages ever recorded in history, but cannot speak without using at least 10 of them simultaneously.

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The power to seduce any woman... that weighs over 300 pounds.

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The power to look at yourself in third person

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the ability to type slower.

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The power to be able to never have a power.

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Nothing to see here, keep moving...

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The power to issue commands to domesticated house cats. Not the power to make them obey your commands, just the power to issue the commands.

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The power to make people extremely happy as soon as you die.

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The ability to be able to transform into a spork.

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The power to have horrible spelling while trying to write an ad for the pointless superpowers app.

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The ability to have a friend names James who dislikes all your Pointless Superpowers

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The power to think about a location and forget that you travelled all the way there, making you think you can teleport.

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The power to obtain money, by going to work

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The power to steal other peoples powers but being the only person in the world with super powers.

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The power to be lazy and a normal human being. The Average Joe Power.

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The power to be a Fox News anchor with something actually coherent to say.

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The power to see in the dark outside but only at day time.

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The power to turn into air and go with the wind

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The power to see through transparent objects.

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The power to be frozen during each heart beat.

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The power to become invincible when you're dead

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The ability to breathe underwater but only when above water

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!