The power to get hard at will.

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The power to see through clothes of women 70+.

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The power to be unconscious during Calculus class.

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The Power to fart extremely loudly every time your in a crowd.

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The ability to read. No wait that is actually helpful. Never mind.

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The power to make an awesome school lunch for the kids!

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The ability to DO A BARREL ROLL

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The power to be a common person

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The power to die at will.

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the power to see everyone as a tree

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The power to have a phone that can't call or text and you can only have it when no one is within 5 miles of you.

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the power to remotely jizz in someone's sock.

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The ability to have laser eyes only when your eyes are closed, you'd kill everyone in your sleep!

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the power to give your mom amazing orgasms by doing her analy

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the power to run in slow motion

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The power to use your penis as a lasso.

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The power to sing with your buttcheeks

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The super power to control paper.

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The ability to make water luke warm.

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The ability to sense a crime has been committed, but only after the criminal has already been caught and safely locked away in jail.

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The ability to change races.

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The power to recite all of Encyclopedia Brown's cases in alphabetical order.

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The ability to see into the past at variable times between 1 and 30 seconds but be incapable of seeing the present.

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The power to snore inhumanly loud

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!