having superpowers during the inquisition

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the ability to command watermelons

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the power to extend commercial time while your in the bathroom

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The power to clap 14 times a second

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The power to control karma. Moral: Karma is a BlTCH! MY BlTCH!

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the power to do one push-up

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The power to be MAGNETO! And have the power to WELCOME TO DIE! You dare not WELCOME TO DIE? AHAHAH! X-CHICKEN!

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The power to smell a fart before someone lets it out.

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spontaneous ejaculation

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The power to be blind when you sleep

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Super-slowness

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The power to instantly see the end of a book or movie, but not the middle or beginning.

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the power to not finish your

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Vanilla scented blood

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The power to kill yourself with a piece of paper.

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To tell how many kids in a sweatshop it took to make your nike's

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The power to know what you do when you discuss the secret formula on the third Wednesday in January and it's not raining outside after we've gargled with vanilla pudding.

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Being able to have diarrhea when every you want.

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The power of having enough money to buy anything, but in only pennies.

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The ability to know exactly where every Canadian penny within 5 feet of you is.

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The power of turning your nose upside down, but only when it's raining... or in the shower.

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The power to breathe through your mouth when you have a stuffy nose

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The power to communicate with dust bunnies.

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The power to survive falls frrom great heights, but only if you land on your index finger.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!