The power to continuously and periodically turn oxygen into carbon dioxide using magic organs in your chest by sucking the the atmosphere through your mouth.

The power to spell-check or at least reread what you're about to post.

The power to revert to a six year old and teleport to the closest pedophile guild

The power of X-ray Viion, that gives you Eye Cancer from the radiation

The power to stick your head up your ass

The power to be arrested for crimes you did not commit

the power to talk to your elbow

The ability to perfectly walk backwards but only when you are sat down.

The power to instantly engrave your face into any urinal anywhere at will.

The power to grow the most sexy tits ever. (If your a straight man)

The ability not to be able to make a bong out of a taco bell cup

The power to find something that isn't in the last place you look.

the ability to taste so good it makes you wanna slap yo mama

The power to don't see the banners, that not meaning that they are not there...

Having a bullet-proof skeleton.

The power to see in black and white.

The power to hover 1 foot off of the ground.

The ability to turn into an embryo

Beeing 99% Bullet proof, with the 1% shifting places to whereever a bullet is about to hit you.

the ability to self resurrect only if you are not dead

The power to summon Wolverine, but only so he can give you a colonoscopy.

Moral man. Moral: I have self irony... which isn't a superpower... neither is being me... But its at least Super pointless and I have the power to do this... SO CLOSE! SO DAMN CLOSE! :(

The power to make yourself fall into a ten year coma.

the power to write amazingly neat but only with invisible ink

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!