The power to read minds, but only those of dead people.

The power to love Justin Bieber

The power to punch anyone as hard as you want but get hit with the same force in your genitals

The power to shoot webs, but only out of your ass

The power to permanently shorten your own penis

The power to revive anyone....But only if they are alive.

The power to stop people from committing suicide just before they do, but only by killing them...

The power to survive falls frrom great heights, but only if you land on your index finger.

The power to kill anyone with your mind, In your imagination.

The power to fly whenever you get a stroke. (The power goes away as soon as the stroke ends, so make sure to get all your flying deeds done while you still have a stroke)

The ability to teleport to any place in the universe, but only if it is currently occupied by something else

The power to use a ridiculous signature that kills any chance of receving green thumbs. Moral: What you talking bout foo?

The power to eat your poop

The power to give automatically give all your money to a Nigerian businessman for a special investment opportunity

the ability to do 3 backflips in a row when no one is looking

the power to shoot what your looking at but only when your looking at watermelons

the power to tie your shoelaces with one hand

The power to die spontaneously, and have no one notice

the power to lift 5 tonnes above your head, but only for 0.1 seconds

The ability to unbleep swear words on your tv.

The power to talk really loud or quiet and you can control it.

The power to stop global warming on the planet Neptune.

The power to Remove 23% of Lint from your clothing Using only A Lint roller.

the power to grow any one hair at any desirable lenght

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!