The power to sense when infomercials will be on hours before they broadcast.

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The super power of randomly confuse the feeling of being about to sneeze and being about to shit yourself

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The power to teleport massive objects one inch above your head.

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Everything you touch turns into piles of steaming shit.

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The power of believing you have a real power when you don't (which doesn't make you have a power at all, and consequently, turns into a paradox). Self-paradox man!

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The power of having night vision that only works during the day

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the power to make things out of thin air that dont work.

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The power to communicate with inter-dimensional beings, but they're reeeeally annoying.

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the power of superspeed but only backwards

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The power to change your urine to any color

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The ability to talk to anybody in the world, as long as they are within your eyesight.

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The power to only make burnt toast

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The power to see through glass doors.

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the power to shit bricks

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The power to scare female plants.

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the power to die at will

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The power to play FPS games in real life (respawning included) but lag a lot

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The ability to turn into an embryo

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The power to bleed anally at will

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Ability to become friends with anyone, but only on facebook

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The power to grow or shrink your height by 6 inches at will, but everytime you do, you grow an extra toe.

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The power to not be able to get powers

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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The power to mind control inanimate objects.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!