The ability to defy death... only when you commit suicide.

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The power to hear a person's thoughts, but only when they're on the toilet.

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The power to hate someone you don't even know

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The power to die when you do Anything!!!

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To pee standing up.

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the power to summon 10 ants every week

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The power to read your own thoughts.

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The power to talk to animals and have them partially understand you.

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The power to return my ps4 for the third time, and wait for months to get a new one only to discover its the tv connection which is broken and I cant afford a new tv because I already spent a lot of money on ps4 games. Mural: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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The power to be a human for 1 second once a month.

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The power to fit through your cat door but only when the door is unlocked.

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The power to have car insurance, but only when you don't have a car.

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The power to remember what your homework is two minutes before you have to turn it in.

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The power to agree to the "Terms of Service" without actually reading them.

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The power to walk on water. But only when it's less than an inch deep.

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The power to turn coleslaw into cabbage.

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The power of getting aroused when someone rubs your kneecaps.

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The power to be never need to use the bathroom

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the power to masturbate just one time a day

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The power to tell if a politician is lying. (They always are.)

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Power to see through walls, but it only works with glass.

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The ability to turn bread into really burnt toast while no one is watching.

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The power to manage Chelsea FC

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The power to spend more than £10 at a starbucks

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!