the ability to fly through the sky using the skin from your ballsack to glide to the ground

(PS: Neo was the seventh Jesus, we live in the matrix)

The power to do nothing

The power to teleport anywhere you don't want to go.

The power to have a second brain, but it has the IQ of a rock.

The power to have a small penis

The ability to control yourself while sleepwalking, but only when you're awake

the power to change the size of your thumb when ever you want

Giving a shit about someone's bull shit

The power to think about useless power

The ability to change clothes instantly every 67 years

The ability to sense any and all ham in a five mile radius.

The ability to pee freshly-made Japanese rice noodles.

The ability to breathe naturally while thinking about breathing

the power to travel to parallel universes where the power to travel to parallel universes doesnt exist

The ability to revert any computer to windows vista. Works best on Linux operating systems.

the power to grow mustache combs from your fingernails, but lack the ability to grow facial hair

The power to always know which way North is but you forget where you are.

The power to be away from the Internet without getting bored.

The power to instantly see the end of a book or movie, but not the middle or beginning.

The ability to never have to take a shit again

the power to make sillet bang remove stains from shirts

The power to die but once

The ability to smell colors.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!