The superpower to poo at will.

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To connect to the Playstation network with your mind! Who would want to?

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the power to know black lives do NOT matter

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The power to flush the toilet in the opposite direction.

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The power to sweat blood uncontrollably out of your anus while singing to Justin Beiber and stabbing yourself in the dick with a machete

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The power to increase the amount of earwax by 300 percent at will.

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The power to hate/love/care about me because of who I am. Moral: Relax dear friends (you other fools relax too) I was born this way, and I love every second of it, I am on fire and this workout gives me so damn much pheromones and testosterone that I am gonna invite a cute friend and have a damn threesome! Why, because its a mans world... never forget that kids...

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The power to move in slow motion whenever running away from danger. Moral: Hilarious! XD

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The power to turn on the TV with the remote

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The power to get a boner when you're horny.

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The power to speak 360 words/min. in multi-language.

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for every time you get emotionally hurt part of you body actually decompose and die.

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The power to understand that Jesus called himself Son of man, which translates into Anderson, which makes a certain movie make a bit more sense. Moral: THIS IS MY WORLD MISTER ANDERSON! MY WOOOOOORLD!

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The power to transform into air.

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The power to have the aim of Torres

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The power to have any power you want but only when it's completely useless to have it.

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The power of not knowing

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The power to turn into paper

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The power to be Sexually Molested And Raped Twice and be smart at the same time.

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The power to turn into a cookie, but only when the person next to you is on a ravenous cookie eating spree.

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The ability to lose Russian rolette, once.

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The power to turn cake into poop.

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The power to look like another person, but only if the other person is uglier

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The power to write fast but only when your hungry

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!