the power to predict Justin Beiber's next album

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The power to not move but your always happy.

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The power to eavesdrop on your best friend from anywhere in the world when he's sleeping.

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The power to shape-shift into a chair, but only a chair

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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The power to orgasm every five.. UGGHOOOAAHAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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the power to travel through in time, but only you when you are sleeping.

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The power to make your nose blink.

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The power to be always invisible, but can't interact with the objects or humans, only with animals.

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the power to know if a movie will suck after you bought the ticket

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the power to read minds but forgetting it for 3 seconds

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The ability to do moderately well on an exam while sharting next to your crush.

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The power to be immortal but only in times where it does not mater, stops working after the age of 50.

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The power to see correctly with wearing glasses

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The power of the most useless power and have that power.

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The power to serve the Lord Dog.

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The ability to read a book by its cover

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The power to make everything except yourself invisible.

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The power to turn into a cat while a dog is watching you.

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The power to believe I type actual morals. Moral: At horsehead network? Now please go look for prostitutes at a church or astronauts under the sea you fucklng ass and blahblah!

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Ladder hands.

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The power to transform into yourself.

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The power to be a dog, with Herpes, that smells like farts.

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The power to make every single person in the world hate you and want you dead.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!