The ability to float sideways very slowly

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The power to increase you`re pain at will.

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Where to start? Ah yes...THE POWER TO NOT FREAKING DO ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!

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The power to give anybody the finger - except the person you're mad at.

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The ability to breath underwater but loses the ability to breath normally forever

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The power to walk on water... but drown in land.

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The power of being invincible, except when a life-threatening situation develops.

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the power to jizz money

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The power to be interrupted in mid sent- "Shut up! I'm trying to sleep!"

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The power to die,but only if your alive!

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The power to be able to see 1 second into the future

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The power to see through solid objects, but only when said solid object is transparent.

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The power to heal yourself but only damage you inflict on yourself.

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The ability to kill anyone, only if he/she is your close friend.

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The power to be stupid reading this.

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the power to see through people's clothing when they're naked

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The power to think of pointless powers.

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The power to be fluent in every language but only when your head is fully submerged underwater.

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The power to fart slightly less deadly

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being able to change shape whist flying "It's a bird!, no it's a plane , It's a flying Sammich!?!

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The ability to see through insects.

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The ability to laugh at migits at inapropriet times.

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The power to cause weeds to grow twice as fast as usual in your bed of prized petunias.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!