The power to be french.

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The power to pee out of your nose and drink out of your ears

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The power to be doing something else then typing a pointless power

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The power to waste time thinking of and uploading pointless superpowers

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The power to fly upwards at Mach 3 speeds, indoors

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The power to see things with your eyes open

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The ability to be poor for life

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The ability to discharge a battery - JW

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The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

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the ability to spin gold into straw

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The power to attract lightning strikes to yourself.

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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The power to turn on your tv with your mind as long as the remote is in your hand and has batteries.

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the ability to walk through your clothes

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The power of total invulnerability and immortality, stops working when you get hurt, or die.

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The power to make high definition photo a hammer (with a red comfortable heated handle with LED flashing lights) appear out of thin air. (Oh, and on a 8"x11" piece of paper of course).

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The power to move 1 minute forward in time every 60 seconds.

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the power to do blink every 20 years

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The power to drink dihydrogen monoxide without dying.

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The power to have useless superpowers which can only be used at wrong times

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The power to shrink smaller than oxygen molecules.

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The power drown in water

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The power to smash people's heads in with things.

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the power to herd cats

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!