The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The power to be anyone you want but your still a nobody

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being abel to turn off your thinking (not back on)

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being allergic to dairy and soy

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the ability to levitate

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The ability to lose 0.000000000001 percent more skin per year.

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The most pointless super power should be - To be able to change your hair dye whenever you want

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the power to stop masturbating every day

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The power to know the answer to every question you're asked, but forgetting it instantly.

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the power to walk on land.

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The power to be special just like everyone else.

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You can have anything you don't want at any time.

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The power to make a small chair appear -- one time.

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The ability to cure polio, but only within U.S. borders.

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The power to walk through air.

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The power to bet on the fastest horse in the track at a formula 1 competition. Moral: RUN FORREST RUUUUUUN!

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the power to pee for longer then a normal person

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The ability to print random memes on their tongue, but it has to be one that everyone in the room has seen before.

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the power to crap out bite-sized super heroes.

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Having perfect 20-20 vision, only when wearing glasses.

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The power to swear if you do not believe in a God. Moral: Meh... if I post anything against God here you guys will thumb me down and that matters... it matters so much that I will use the section over to shit talk God... yeah... thumb me down already fearing zealots... show me your true power (being Gods bitches) now that is pointless power!

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to be one second faster than 5mph in any 80's arcade game using one finger to push the buttons

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The ability to see the future through the eyes of people you don't know in places you can never go while you are doing life threatening work.

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The power to do nothing at all without getting bored or tired.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!