_/?\_ (?`_´) SON GET IN THE SCOUT TANK WE'RE KILLING THE SCAMMERS

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The power to die at any moment you want.

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The ability to avoid work when connected to the internet. Thanks, by the way.

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to zap people but only yourself

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The power to walk on very very shallow water (

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The power to do a barrel roll without instruction

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The ability to laugh at migits at inapropriet times.

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The power to change any of your friend's name to Tom but only if their real name is Thomas.

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The power to die at will.

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The power to see through clothes of only ugly people

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The power to cause weeds to grow twice as fast as usual in your bed of prized petunias.

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The power to fly for 2 seconds when jumping

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The power to cash cheques that are only ever made out to someone else.

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The power of being pointless

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The ability to lose 0.000000000001 percent more skin per year.

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the power to randomly die at any moment

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being abel to turn off your thinking (not back on)

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The power to elect George W Bush.

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The power to be anyone you want but your still a nobody

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the ability to levitate

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being allergic to dairy and soy

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the power to walk on land.

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The ability to cure polio, but only within U.S. borders.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!