the power to tie your shoelaces with one hand

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The superpower to fly but when you reach 55 feet up you loose your power

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The ability to cross the Do Not Cross tape at crime scenes

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The power of licking your own elbow and nose

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The power to do anything as if you were god but only after you slay a mythical dragon and eat an Unicorn's poop.

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The power to wake up one second earlier than everyone else.

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The power to type useless powers that no one's ever gonna read.

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The ability to go poop and pee.

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The power to fuck any person of the opposite sex, but you're incredibly gay.

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The power to pronounce the word "rural."

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The power of absolutely flawless hindsight. -Credit to South Park

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the power to make coffee room temperature by touching it

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the power to create carbon dioxide (its the stuff you breathe out)

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Be able to hear all the alarmclocks in the world

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The power to run at the speed of a human

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The power to make police pull over the black guy next to you (in your car) and anytime this happens you get the ticket not him

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the power to hope you get a job at the mall because they laid everybody off and sent the jobs off somewhere cheap

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The power to constantly stumble upon the twilight zone. Moral: *creepy theme*

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The ability to rectify health and safety concerns, using a sword.

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The power to perform incredible feats of strength and speed but only while on an elevator.

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Brazilian waxing via telepathy.

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The power to have sex and sleep at the same time

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the ability to see through air

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The ability to sense a crime has been committed, but only after the criminal has already been caught and safely locked away in jail.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!