open up pickles glass

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The power of omniscience but it causes a near fatal heart attack every time you think.

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the power to count from A to purple

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The power to give yourself a migraine at will.

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Th power to have a 10 minute delayed reaction, so if you stub your toe 10 minutes later you scream like a f***nut

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The ability to shoot guns, but the guns have to have no ammo to shoot.

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The power to orgasm every five.. UGGHOOOAAHAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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The power to sharpen mechanical pencils and pens.

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The power to not get shit dick

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anything Aquaman does

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The power to find the end of the sticky tape

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The power to fart to inside. By mouth.

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The power to die

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Invisibility, when no one is looking.

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The ability to stop only ONE bullet and ONE bullet only

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The power to step only on the surface of lego bricks, no other surface.

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The power to resurrect dead insects

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The power to fly if you are eating.

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the power to make a super smelly fart every time you eat 40 cotton balls

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the power to like mass effect 3

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the power to talk backwards

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the power to be invisible when sleep.

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The power to row 1 inch shorter but can't grow 1 inch taller

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!