The power to move the remote from the coffee table, where it is sitting 2 feet out of reach, into your hands

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The power to know all the answers to life after you are fatally wounded.

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Being able to fly.... in the water.

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The ability to predict what will appear on ReCaptcha, SOLVEmedia, and all that stuff, before you see it.

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The power to produce wi-fi but with password no one knows.?

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The power to (place useless super power here)

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The power to not get a boner when seeing a hot girl.

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The power to be Chuck Norris

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The power to bingewatch an entire season of a TV show in only five minutes, only to not remember any of it and have to watch it all again through normal means.

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The power too be a professonal hacker but a kid could delete it.

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The power to communicate with dust bunnies.

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Being Aquaman

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The power to piss only when sleeping.

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The power to turn Wii controllers into broken TV sets.

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The power to use your penis and testicles as a powerful one time grenade in case you get assaulted. (probably the most pointless power ever)

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The power to grow nipples all over your body at will

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The ability to see through insects.

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The power to teleport yourself to the nearest exit location.

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The power to transform yourself into a door.

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The power to exaggerate everything, a power a billion, trillion overly trabillion times more powerful than anything, like 3000000 Chuck Norrises, except they are all weak in comparison to this power.

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The power to torture yourself and you are also immortal but will immediately die if you are not constantly tortured in a way that is 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 times worse then you can even imagine and are so terrified of dying that you would rather be tortured for all eternity.

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I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

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The ability to go forward in time at will.

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The ability to evolve into magickarp

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!