The power to make all girls look pretty but only in your head and only if you drunk enough.

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The power to float a centimeter above the ground.

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The power to go blind at will.

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The power to transform money into cow eating chickens

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The power to give automatically give all your money to a Nigerian businessman for a special investment opportunity

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the power to fly, but only when you poop

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I got rhe power to always respawn in the middle of a noob tube. it's a blast...

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The power to teleport to the middle of the Pacific Ocean

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The power to stop time, but be stopped with time also.

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The power to turn left while actually being right about right being left so you end up heading upways down the street and confuse the shit out of people. Moral: But will it blend?

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The power to realize that I am starting to sound (and type) more and more like Salvador Dali, and being proud because the man was a genius, the most fantastic thing he could do every morning, was to wake up with a person as fantastic as himself! And while he indeed walked a different path than most do, no one can deny his footprints are clearer than most... Perfection? A losers wish... to be outstanding... is a gift on its own. Moral: Yeah many of you see this as pointless, so I thought I could just as well add it. While I dream of the age where people stop looking for Gods and strengthen the most powerful tool in the universe: YOU.

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to talk in a mexican accent whenever you want to say "Whats up Essay"

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the power to be in minecraft but as a pig near someones house

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The power to download anything you want to 99 percent complete.

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The power to write in invisible ink

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Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

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The ability to hear people's thoughts after they've already said them.

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the power to make thin air that is harmless

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The power to smell feces from a mile away.

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The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times, and just in case of trouble, you can change back by doing the same this time. (good luck jumping inside a sealed casket smartass.

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The ability to print random memes on their tongue, but it has to be one that everyone in the room has seen before.

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The power to fry and suffer harder than anyone when lit on fire.

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The power to make a small chair appear -- one time.

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The power to drink 10 gallons of water only when you desperately need to piss.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!