the power to speak only in binary

I have the power to force farts out of my ass.

the power to hold your breath 0.01 seconds longer than the average human

The power to teleport massive objects one inch above your head.

The power to jump over mountains but die when you hit the ground.

the power to turn into a narwhal. Once. At your grandmother's funeral

The power to be blind when you sleep

The power of believing you have a real power when you don't (which doesn't make you have a power at all, and consequently, turns into a paradox). Self-paradox man!

The ability to like this post

The ability to give the best hugs in the world to people who don't need be hugged

the power to be blind, but only if you're blind

The ability to see through insects.

Being alive (until you die).

The power to have the power to have the power to have the power to have the power to have the power to have the power to have the power to say that you have got the power to have the power of power stuff.

The ability to ingest Dihydrogen-monoxide and survive.

The power to fly but only when your in space.

The power to grab a cup of purple drank, Then drink it

The power to sleep while you're awake.

The ability to speak Latin but only when no one can hear you

The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

the power to kill plants in a desert.

The power to be a really good bowler, but only with a bowling ball that has the skull of your dead father embedded in its center.

The power to be arrested for crimes you did not commit

the ability to summon a jar of marmalade the forces people to commit adultery

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!