The power to speak with dead relatives, but only whilst masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

The Power of Anti-Sex

thumb_up thumb_down -66

The power to become yourself

thumb_up thumb_down -68

The power to talk to your socks but only when they're dying...

thumb_up thumb_down +43

The ability to read anything, and never understand it.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

The power to create wifi but only on the third Sunday of May every million decades

thumb_up thumb_down +35

the power to hate Raymond, and like Chris.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

The power to go back in time and kill Hitlerr, only after you've had sex with him though

thumb_up thumb_down +27

the power to in power your self

thumb_up thumb_down +25

The power to make things invisible...to you.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

See the answers to any question inside your head while suffering from severe dyslexia.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The power to flip the world upside-down when you do a handstand.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The power to fall asleep at will. But it's only active when you're asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The power to turn into a two by two LEGO piece - once.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

The power to take a s*** on people

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The power to not move or do anything.... at all

thumb_up thumb_down +9

(PS: Neo was the seventh Jesus, we live in the matrix)

thumb_up thumb_down +9

i remember coming up with one once, the ability to flash step, like teleportation, but it uses up the same amount of wear and tear on your body(and clothing/footwear) and stamina as if you walked a straight line there (say you were Stepping to the top of mount everest, the same amount of physical exhaustion and bodily wear and tear as if you tilted the earth, laid a flat board to the summit, and walked across it, and untilting the earth, all in an instant). where the only convenience obtained is time saved, but there would also be the issue of being constantly exhausted, the near limitless amounts of food needed to be consumed, and the constant need for sleep would make this power essentially useless except for convenience, you COULD say this is similar to stopping time, but with far more limitations, as its only used for moving from one place to another

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The power to divide by zero, but not remember how when someone asks you.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The power to give epilepsy to hamsters.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The power to turn into a parking lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The power to foresee events, one yoctosecond before it happens

thumb_up thumb_down +1

the power to see through my eye lids

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The ability to eat anything except for food

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!