The power to have an internal monologue voiced by Morgan Freeman.

The power to have a normal sized torso, but short legs.

To have the ability to trip over your own "meat curtains" at will and make it look graceful... somehow.

The power to have as much fun typing these as me. Moral: Of course you possess no such "useless" superpower you sad loser!

Can fall without taking any injury, but for only 1 foot.

the power to view the same insurance commercials over and over for years and recite them from memory

The power to eat ass.

The power to die but once

The power to be writing a pointless superpower on a website about pointless superpowers when you could be doing something productive.

the power to charge rechargeable batteries.

The power to turn everything one touches with one's hand into skittles, but only applying to amputees.

the power to shoot poop very far out your butt

The power to magically generate drugs in your pockets, but only while being arrested or in a police station.

power to permanently shrink one eye.

The power to destroy the earth the next time you blink.

The Power to rot you favorite food by looking at it

The power to fly during 0,2 seconds.

The power to pee standing up

The power to bleed

the ability to touch type but only when you have no hands

The power to shrink your dick smaller but an inability to make it larger (even back to the original size).

The ability to go to hell.

The power to be a woman

The pewer to become a human bullet magnet. Moral: "DONT WORRY PEOPLE! I SHALL SAVE YOU ALL!" (Well if you want to sacrifice yourself to save them all, then you its useful and you a douchebag)

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!