the power to die at will

The power to play FPS games in real life (respawning included) but lag a lot

The power to nag at the speed of light before he even thinks about doing it you can literally nag him to death faster then the rapper twister can say his own name!!!

The power to kill yourself when you are dead.

The ability to fart like a zombie.

The power to grow or shrink your height by 6 inches at will, but everytime you do, you grow an extra toe.

Be dumb and gay like austin Calhoun

The power to single handily tear one sheet of toilet paper from the roll

Ability to become friends with anyone, but only on facebook

The ability to know what people think of you when they see you. But you already know everyone hates you.

The power to communicate with dust bunnies.

to run super fast but every minute you have to pee

The power to charge your iPhone if it is not an iPhone

The power to sleep but only when its past midnight

The power to jump high into the sky, only to drop down later...

The ability to digest three types of earth elementals

The power to stop global warming on the planet Neptune.

The power to mind control inanimate objects.

The power to microwave bread

The power to party like it is 1999 despite it being 2011

The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

The ability to poop glue.

The power to get a cold in the wintertime.

the power to make your nose longer by 5 centimeter on command

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!