The ability to give yourself brain cancer at will

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The ability to turn into Jeff the Magic Cactus Baby, for a second, while you are sleeping.

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The power to look busy at work but only when the boss is not looking.

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The power to kill yourself.

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The power to glow in the dark but only when your really sleepy.

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The power to breath fire even though you are not fireproof.

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The ability to go 100% slower

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the power to get every girl, that you're not into.

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The power to kiss my mom' s ass from long distances

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the power to have sex with any women you want. with your whole family watching

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The power to exude spaghetti from your pockets, which is never stopped. The spaghetti keeps coming. Out of your pockets. Spaghetti everywhere.

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Power to vomit violently during royal weddings.

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The power to be impressed by Sham-Wow

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The power to have morning sickness in the evening.

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The power to throw your crotch as a powerful one time grenade.

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The power to have the longest little finger

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The power to make any woman have volcanic earth.shattering orgasms but only if she's having sex with another man

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The power to wink with both eyes

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the ability to take a fart that other people can actually see.

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The power to be able to get up 11.5% quicker than the average perosn

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The power to create a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that does nothing.

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The power to never drop something, as long as it is touching the ground. - JC

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The power to become real life Captain Arabian. Example: Hey nice suit, does the A on your forehead stand for America? ALALALALALALALAH! *BOOOOOOM* Moral: Next time you see someone that looks like Captain America, you better run.

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Can fall without taking any injury, but for only 1 foot.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!