The power to kick ass when your names aoife.

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The power to teleport up to 35 feet once a year

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The ability to make the girl of your dreams fall in love with you BUT you become a retarded octopus if you use this power

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the power to make sounds by vibrating your vocal cords.

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The power to flush the toilet in the opposite direction.

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The power to read and agree to the terms of service.

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The power to have tacos appear in front of you, only to have them stolen by a black guy.

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The power to make green lights turn red on approach.

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the power to become incredibly stupid, but only during a math test.

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A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The ability to control yourself while sleepwalking, but only when you're awake

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The power of night-vision, but only you're in a bright place.

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The power to erase stupid blogs or comments

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The power to have orgasm everytime a cold breeze rolls in

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the power to commit crime.

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The power to finish right before you start (If you know what I mean)

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The power to fill in ___ blank

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The power to poop and pee at the same time

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The power to shape-shift, but only into: Rebecca Black, Justin Bieber, or Hannah Montana.

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the power to eat gold and turn it into koosh balls

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The power to speak Spanish, but only to people who do not speak Spanish.

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The power to make fish drown.

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The power to lick your elbow if it is coated with butter at exactly 36 degrees Celsius.

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The power to make Justin Beiber come out of the closet.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!