the power to steal 4 avocados in july at a supermarket at 9:37 am in your underpants without arms while a cop laughs at how stupid you look. plus while you do that a cute marshmallow comes and rapes your children.

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Thhe ability to cry acid

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To stab Djones

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The power to change the color of the hair on your right buttocks to any color that starts with B.

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The power to talk to anyone in any language, but only to deaf people.

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The power live 0.0000001 seconds longer.

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the power to not watch south park

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The ability to actually KILL IT! KILL IT WITH FIRE!

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The power to have your brain shut down when you take any type of drug

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The power to levitate only down stairs

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to be able to walk on water for 2minutes at a time

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The power to be able to do things right, but only when you're not doing them.

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the ability to poop out of someone elses butt.

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The uncontrollable power of making your sex partner sleep

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The power to fluently speak all languages of the world but only when you are sleeping.

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The power of night-vision, but only you're in a bright place.

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The power to freeze yourself be stripping in the artic

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the power to sense the next viewing of the hit musical 'CATS'

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The power to time travel to the present moment

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the ability to go the speed limit

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The ability to have an acid flashback everytime your at a redlight.

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The power to run in an endless circle

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the ability to only fall asleep in showers

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The power to turn invisible but only when playing a trombone

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!