The ability to make yourself rich unless you are using it on yourself...

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The power to become famous on vine

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The power of superman while never being able to leave Krypton.

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The ability to open your window, and shout retarded things at your neighbors. "HEY! MY ASH SMELLS LIKE BANANAS!"

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The power to inflict the most agonizing pain to yourself. Can only be used once and it doesn't go away

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The ability to control the universe everytime you lick your own elbow!

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the power to be good at something your already good at.

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The power to magically summon a knife at a gunfight. Moral: "A knife in a gunfight is pretty good when the guns run out of ammo"

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The power to be able to vote for Donald Trump

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Teh pewer off havin noo sentense speeled rite.

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The power to make an apple you're holding taste delicious, but only for other people

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The power to surround yourself in fire, but only when you're underwater.

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the power to put paper to your nose and blow strange liqeud type substance into it.

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The power to ejaculate needles.

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The ability to see women naked, but only if they weigh 400 pounds or more.

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The power to get laid by your right hand.

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The power to do something as powerful as thin air

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The power think five times slower.

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The power to keep up with the kardashians

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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The power to turn on your tv with your mind as long as the remote is in your hand and has batteries.

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what do you call someone who never says hello............................ a shy person

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The power to attract lightning strikes to yourself.

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The ability to make slightly off colored flags of any country that can not be used in combat.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!