The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The ability to walk on your hands because your feet have nails in them.

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The power to be powerless

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The power to smell like body odor at will

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The power to immediately become comatose every time you blink.

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The power to run like Nicolas Cage.

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The power to instant nose-bleed, but not be able to stop it.

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The power to row 1 inch shorter but can't grow 1 inch taller

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The power to smell inside of your own butt.

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the power to make a super smelly fart every time you eat 40 cotton balls

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The ability to cut your stool in to tiny pieces smaller than a pea

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The power to laught at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

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The power to single handily tear one sheet of toilet paper from the roll

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The power to do a wheelie on. Unicycle

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The power to bet on the fastest horse in the track at a formula 1 competition. Moral: RUN FORREST RUUUUUUN!

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The power to never be cold, but only when it is above 80 degrees.

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the power to turn everthing you touch into to some form of pork but you are an orthodox jew

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the power to time travel to the same time, date, and year

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The power to make really bad jokes: knock knock who's there chicken chicken who no thats an owl not a chicken, you goose!

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The power to lower your own ego.

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The power to read terms and conditions

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The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

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Acid tears.

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The power to make only right turns. take THAT nascar!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!