- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to blink 1.0000000000001 times faster than the average human.

The power to make yourself the dumbest idiot in the entire universe.

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The power to regulate your body temperature at about 98 degrees at all times.

The power to like Justin Bieber

The power to hear a "SSSSSSSS" sound, then be blown up.

the power to be able to switch tabs on your computer two seconds after your parents walk in the room

the power to run at the speed of light, but you have no protection from the air friction so you'll burn up and die.

The power to jump several thousand feet in the air, without the power to survive the impact of landing

Being alive (until you die).

The power to move 1 minute forward in time every 60 seconds.

The ability to break all of your bones when you see any person

The power to steal other people's pointless superpowers.

the power to turn wine into water.

Breath powers so strong your normal breath alone can break down walls whenever you get a cold.

The power to become a lime only when you're left nipple brushes against your left shoe whilst it is superglued to your ding dong and you're strapped to a bed naked in the woods.

the ability to make real zero dollar bills

Clairvoyance, but only when your mothers having intimacy with your dad.

The power to answer trivia questions, but only being able to do so in a loud, aggressive voice.

captain obvious

The power to commit suicide.

The ability to turn cement into pudding

the ability to jump up absurd down. Without your feet leaving the ground.

power to breathe

Pointless Super Powers