The power to cause slow people in front of you in the corridor to walk 3% faster

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The power of heat vision* *Only for cooking.

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The power to be a MISSERABLE PILE OF SECRETS! BUT ENOUGH TALK (glass breaks) HAVE AT YOU! Moral: More are gonna get this one than those below, this one is merely a quote rather than cerebral. But you can always pretend to understand it by thumbing it up, or down if you just fail at understanding, either way is fine.

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The power to make anyone even on live tv such as news or sports to explosively crap their pants.

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The power to lick anything except pussy.

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The ability to hear people's thoughts after they've already said them.

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The power of singing piano playing and color blindness. Moral: "The skies are orange! Blue Roses too"

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The power to eat, just one, Lays potato chip.

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The power to turn pizza into math worksheets. -Big C

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the power to fire my lazer

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To Shoot Piss Out Of Your Mouth Only If You Are Taking A Dump

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PATTIES THAT ARE SUPPOSEDLY READY TO EAT, BUT COVERED IN STICKY HARDENED FAT! Moral: Damn greasy hand surprise! I was going all victoly on guilty gear XXX

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The ability to mess up a Rubix Cube with your mind

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The power to touch the lava when falling off the couch

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the power to have a pointless superpower

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the power to fart in 7 different colors

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the ability to figure out exam questions, but only after the exam.

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The power to run as fast as a snail.

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the power to say everything in Comic Sans font.

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the power to dislike this power

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the power to waste time watching a video about pointless superpowers while using this website

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The power to cry sulfuric acid.

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The power to die

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The power to not being able to go use the bathroom when you have to

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!