The power to abstain from sex until you're married. At age 83.

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The power to drink any amount of water but get dehydrated in the next 5 seconds. :/

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The ability to turn door knobs with your feet every other even day.

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The power to finish right before you start (If you know what I mean)

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The Power to have a bowel movement.

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The power to hold your breath when you die

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The power to shoot sperm out of your eyes

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the power to predict what you are going to post on facebook

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The ability to erase your own memory of your ability.

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The power to gain an erection at will but only in front of your mother

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The power to wait for the moment... TO THE NEXT WAITING MOMENT! And then the wait for the moment... FOR THE NEXT WAITING MOMENT

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The power to throw a Boomerang and it always hit your head.

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the power to fly but only during a severe hail storm

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The power to teleport, but in doing so you lose a limb.

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The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

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The power to turn into a magikarp

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The power to walk upside down but only when you're in Australia.

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Pain Absorber. Where u rid others of their pain but suffer yourself !!

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The power to have super-sonic hearing but only for one second every three hours.

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The power to kill yourself with a piece of paper.

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the power to listen to dead people that speak a different language than you.

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The ability to grow and retract your hair at will, but cutting it will remove the ability.

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The power... to move you.

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the power to the power to sit on your computer all day and read all of these pointless super powers while eating or drinking soda

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!