the power to get a random fruit every 10 days...

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The power to be so fast, that if you sprint forward you travel the whole world just in time to fuck yourself.

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The power to eat pop-tarts as soon as they pop out of the toaster

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The power to spit so hard and fast that you hit yourself in the back of the head every time... and it can only be used once, because its so hard it goes trough everything...(thus hits you in the skull duh) including your skull... Moral: Remember kids! Protect, Serve and Survive, and ask your mommy and daddy why they make the sexytime... their response may be pretty interesting...

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The ability to go to hell.

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The power to punch with the force of hulk ... But Die instintly

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The power to be the best video game player ever but you have squeakers follow you everywhere calling you a hacker and saying there going to report you

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The power of making your tits smaller

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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teh pwoer 2 rite liek dis!!!11!1!111!!!! ex dee

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The power to teleport 13,000,000,000 lightyears but not be able to return.

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The power to eat, just one, Lays potato chip.

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To be able to catch a speeding bullet with your head.

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The power to perform incredible feats of strength and speed but only while on an elevator.

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Black power

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The power to make rain stop, only on sunny days.

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The ability to abruptly end conversations.

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The power to do something while you can play games.

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the power to be super ugly

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The ability to trip on flat surfaces

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The power to turn into a lamp and stay that way till someone turns your light on.

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Actually, scratch that. . My pointless superpower would be having an ability to do something specific during a period when pretty much all others also have the capability to do that very same thing.

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the power to have an idea..

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The power to be powerless in situations u need them the most.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!