- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

To turn instantly water proof while eating a burito

The epic power of laser pointer vision.

making a sentence of pointless superpowers on pointlesssuperpower.com.

The power to jump over any fence no matter how high! Good luck surviving the fall.

To be able to go to the future but only at 1 second per second.

The power to fly, but only when you are less than a foot off the ground.

The power to shovel well. To shovel very well.

The power to run at 0.5mph

The power to breath Oxygen

The ability to excrete Hydrochloric acid, but only in your stomach.

The power to think of pointless powers.

the power to fly, but only when you poop

The power to use your penis and testicles as a powerful one time grenade in case you get assaulted. (probably the most pointless power ever)

The power to taste food 3 seconds before they eat it.

The power to completely understand Monty Python sketches.

The power to give yourself a staticshock, every time you touch yourself.

the power to give yourself cancer that you can't get rid of

to be shitty

The power to only sit down and not stand up.

the power to be able to foresee your death within a millisecond of it happening

The ability to turn anything into a belt.

The power to expel a slight breeze after inhaling.

To be able to bend glass at will but if any of the glass breaks you break with it

The ability to quit smoking by giving yourself lung, heart, and throat cancer, coupled with enphysema.

Pointless Super Powers