the power to eat 10 cotton balls every year

The power to nag at the speed of light before he even thinks about doing it you can literally nag him to death faster then the rapper twister can say his own name!!!

thw power to not feel anything during sex unless you dont like the sex (ie rape, ugly fat pearson)

The power to become a laptop forever!

The power to use the english language to grammatical perfection. er, ferpection.

the power to hurl apples at force but only when you have drunk 20 litres of water in one go

Which one is more pointless? 1. The power to have all of Suprman power, but lose them every time you needed. 2. The power to have all of Suprman power, but only to die from exposure to kryptonite.

The ability to quit smoking by giving yourself lung, heart, and throat cancer, coupled with enphysema.

the power to tell Austin Zachrich to go pee

The power of immortality while suicidal.

The power to make any liquid luke warm (it works both ways)

The Power to make people see a picture of you naked in their heads.

the power to nap instantly, but only when you're tired.

the ability to add edges to any circle on anything that you can write on

The ability to print random memes on their tongue, but it has to be one that everyone in the room has seen before.

The power to create a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that does nothing.

The power to automatically yell every action you do like in a Japanese fighting game, I once started doing this for fun, at the end of the day eveyone hated me, good luck. (OPEN DOOR! OPEN DOOR! CLOSE DOOR! POOL SHOT! CUMMING HARD CUMMING HARD! SONIC BOOM! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! TAKING A PUNCH TO THE FACE UPPERCUT!)

teleport to the place where you stand

The power to gain an erection at will but only in front of your mother

the power to time travel to the present

The power to know you don't have a superpower

The power to read the mind of a cow that has produced a piece of cheese that has traveled 447,800 miles but only when looking at that piece of cheese

The power to shrink boobs by merely touching them.

The power to fuck your moms pussy at will (her opinion or desire means nothing to the will of your useless superpower!). Moral: SONS OF SICKMAN FRAUD REJOICE!

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!