The power to read captchas 2% faster than usual.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

The power to be a MISSERABLE PILE OF SECRETS! BUT ENOUGH TALK (glass breaks) HAVE AT YOU! Moral: More are gonna get this one than those below, this one is merely a quote rather than cerebral. But you can always pretend to understand it by thumbing it up, or down if you just fail at understanding, either way is fine.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

The power to be superman on a planet without a sun

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The ability to see into the present.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

The power to phase through walls whenever there is a door nearby leading to the next room

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The power to make people disappear bye closing your eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The power to expel a single spaghetti from any limb randomly

thumb_up thumb_down +21

the power to remotely jizz in someone's sock.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Liam Brudenell

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The power to get laid by your right hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The power to turn random things that you touch into water, like in a schick hydro commercial

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The power to create another human

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The power to create skype chats with 50 people and subsequently annoy all of them with 200+ messages per second. unfortunately neither you nor anybody can block, silence or leave the chat

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The ability to fly as high and as far as you want for 5 minutes, but you will always forget the time limit, and fall to the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The power to see the future when you sleep but forget it as soon as you wake up

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The power to kill anyone just by threatening them with slavery and death and leaving foot and fingerprints all around their place. Moral: THREATEN MY PEOPLE WITH SLAVERY AND DEATH! THIS IS SPARTA!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The power to not get shit d*ck

thumb_up thumb_down +9

the power to make hate films against Islam... theres no space for bigots and jerks on this Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The power to give ANY girl the best orgasm she will ever have, but only when in Vatnajökulsþjóðgarður, Iceland. Between the local time of 3am-3:15am.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The power to get stuck to doorknobs in dangerous situations

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Will i tell you the joke about the butter? Aww no you'll only spread it!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The power to make everyday Christmas once a year

thumb_up thumb_down +3

the power to be Justin bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The Power of Anti-Sex

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!