The power to telekinetically pick your nose and eat it.

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the powers to be a fat gassy woman

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The power to state the obvious at will.

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The ability to have all your dreams be nightmares that you remember vividly.

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The power to read upside down...only when you're upside down.

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sdrawkcab gnipyt ta dab eb tub sdrawkcab daer ot rewop eht

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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the power to uncontrollably say but I love you, when you're breaking up with someone

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Meltman, with the power to melt!

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The power to die and come back to life in the middle of a crossfire between two tanks.

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The to ejaculate anytime but only when your mom appears in front of you.

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Brazilian waxing via telepathy.

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The power to vomit pizza and root beer chunks at will.

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The power to be a dick.

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The power to turn everything you touch into shit.

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The power to lose your hearing and eyesight/

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the power to itch your teeth

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The power to skid against the ground at 45 mph

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The power to read minds only when people are thinking of broken pencils in a bowl full of acid.

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The power to be a limbless emotionless and powerless being but being a total Invincible person in return.

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power to blow up your own head only once,

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The ability to have udders for nipples.

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The power to, receive THE POWER! What is this power you may ask... it is the power of TRUE POWER!

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The power that turns farts into music.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!