The power to shoot lasers out your eyes but the first time you do it it burns your eyes and you go blind

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the power to be in AA.

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the power of wanting to download paid games for free and always failing

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The power to see concrete yellow

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The ability to say YOLO without getting shot.

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The power to turn vaseline into mercury whenever you think about throwing away a perfectly good taco

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The superpower to run at the speed of light, without having the body to handle such unnatural extension... Moral: YOU CANT HANDLE THE...

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The power to waste your time making a pointless website so that other people could waste there time.

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the power to make plants grow at a slightly excelled rate when lying on top of them .... you also smell like shit, all the time.

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The power to be afraid of movies that are not scary

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The power to turn into random objects

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The ability to talk to deer, only while riding one.

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The power to tie your shoes...... while your on BOTH knees

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the power to twerk as good as miley cyrus

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the power to be extremely guilty in the bum.

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The power to smell a fart upwind.

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The ability to find a use for High School Algebra.

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The power to become as big and powerful as Gary Coleman.

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The power of dying whenever you want.

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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The power to instantly determine when someone is a dumbass.

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blindness

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The ability to speak all languages ever recorded in history, but cannot speak without using at least 10 of them simultaneously.

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The power to throw your crotch as a powerful one time grenade.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!