The power to make infinite paper clips.

the power to teleport yourself to a volcano core

the power to time travel to the present

The power to get hard at will.

power to fly...backwards.

The power to shorten your lifespan by 10 seconds.

The ability to know all the cheats/hacks for Half-Life 3.

The power to plank

The power to see when people fart.

The power to have a phone that can't call or text and you can only have it when no one is within 5 miles of you.

the power to remotely jizz in someone's sock.

The power to die and come back to life in the middle of a crossfire between two tanks.

The ability to swim in water.

The power to (involuntarily) duplicate someone's wounds or illnesses by touching them.

To the comment below: You wont get a chance to miss me mortal... Moral: The color of envy... you wish you could be like me... everyone of you, yet some of you got the balls/pussies to prove it! For the people! For the freedom of speech! For courage and strength! For balls of steel! For the ladies... and most importantly... because I f*cking want to! NOW AND FOREVER! I AM MORAL MAN!

The power to gain 10 pounds whenever you eat something

the power to absorb other superpower, but no one have superpower

the power to suck but only when your awesome

The power to give onesself a heart attack just by thinking about it.

The power to sing with your buttcheeks

The ability to de-carbonate soda

The super power to control paper.

The ability to sense a crime has been committed, but only after the criminal has already been caught and safely locked away in jail.

The power to recite all of Encyclopedia Brown's cases in alphabetical order.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!