The power to change the channel without a remote, but only but only if you're holding the remote.

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the power to speak fluent clingon, but only to the non-metally disabled

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the power to never be late to work, but only when you're unemployed.

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the power to make your nipples taste like shit and your shit taste like nipples

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The power to time-travel to the moment you die.

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The power to be fireproof under water

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the power to open doors that are unlocked

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The power to change colors to the excact same as before.

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The power to produce highly concentrated sulphuric acid in your sweat glands.

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the ability to make your eyes pop out.

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The power to know if someone in China eats Rice

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The power to turn rice into cooked rice with your hands, but only exactly one rice at a time.

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The power to become a destructive green beast that demolishes cities, which you have absolutely no control over whenever you get angry or scared.

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The super power to make sandwiches oober quick

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The power to be invisible to the motion sensor cameras above automatic doors

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The power to do nothing with your life.

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Really bendy thumb

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The ability to walk backwards... backwards.

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The power to see through glass

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The power to be a common person

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The power to smell a fart from a 500 mile radius.

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The power to fart to inside. By mouth.

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The power to have no power.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!