The power of drawing perfects dog dicks, but not dogs at all.

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The power to temporarily give yourself a random STD.

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The ability to walk on water, but only if you're Jesus

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The power to not be Chuck Norris.

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To be bulletproof unless you get shot by a gun

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The ability to fart and pee twice in one go.

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The power to fly upwards but not downwards

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The power of getting a boner, but only when your mother is near...

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the power to make as many dogs appear as you want but they don't listen to anyone and they have rabies

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The ability to levitate but only if you're touching the ground

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The power to look good, but only when you have no where to go.

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The power to continuously and periodically turn oxygen into carbon dioxide using magic organs in your chest by sucking the the atmosphere through your mouth.

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The power to change the tv channel only when you have the remote in your hands.

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The power to shoot a any amount of milk out of your belly button every July 4th at 2 o'clock

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The Power To Make Someone Cry A Single Tear, Once A Day,

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To grow your fingernails out and in very quickly.

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The power to misspell things when doing a captcha

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The ability to never see CGI in any movie ever again

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The power to turn into Patrick Star permenently and be dumb as him.

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the power to not die only when someone shoots you in your left heel.

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The power to make a child in Africa die of starvation every time you sneeze

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The power to undress using your mind...but only when in the presense of a rapist

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the ability to tell what some last ate smelling their farts

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Backpack with everything.. ..except the things needed in any given situation.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!