The ability to make your fingernails grow an inch whenever you like, but only on a Tuesday

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Super strength, but when nobody is watching, (including you)

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the power to die at will

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The power to read Chuck-E-Cheese's mind.

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The power to control other people's actions... only when you're alone!

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the power to shoot a powerful red laser beam everytime you open your eyes.

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The true motor of bliss runs on sex and ice cream with no flavor but calling august to see if life will eat us all or not. And she is. And he is. But the dance is corrupted with none-music and machin touch down there.....

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The power to piss in a toilet when your drunk

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The power to sneeze backwards

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The power to simply walk into mordor

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The power to pass incredibly powerful gas at the most inconvenient of times

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Batman

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the power to predict the past

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the ability to drive on the hood of the car

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The ability to never pick up on sarcasm.

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Power to turn your liver invisible.

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The ability to throw sacks filled with butter at Finn the Human

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the ability to shit active helicopters

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The ability to defacate any object you want, unless the object in question is smaller than motorbike.

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The power to be able to walk .00000002 times faster whenever you want

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The power to paint as if you were michelangelo but only if your painting sad clowns eating knives

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the power to charge your phone anywhere, but only when its fully charged.

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The power to automatically register soda caps online, but only if it's Diet.

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The power to create cavities in your teeth.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!