The power to make your left hand glow whenever you put your right hand up your ass.

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The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

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The power to turn aluminum foil into tin foil.

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the power to make plants grow at a slightly excelled rate when lying on top of them .... you also smell like shit, all the time.

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The power to have any nice guy, but they're all gay.

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The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

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the ability to stop time on your watch, wall clocks, and everything that runs on battery.

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Having a 5 second eidetic memory

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The power to be invulnerable while sleeping

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The power to think up the best lines but forget them when you try to speak

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The power to magically summon a knife at a gunfight. Moral: "A knife in a gunfight is pretty good when the guns run out of ammo"

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The power to get rid of all advertisements, but only when your eyes are closed.

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the power to charge rechargeable batteries.

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The power to be the best video game player ever but you have squeakers follow you everywhere calling you a hacker and saying there going to report you

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The power to read minds, but only that of someone who is watching Twilight.

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The ability to read children's books twice as fast as any given child.

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Power to turn off your computer randomly. You cannot controll that power.

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The power to make somebody fall in love with anybody who isn't you.

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The power of becoming an apple tree

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The power to make broccoli turn purple and give it eyes

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The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

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The power to time travel 60 seconds a minute

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The ability to look directly at the sun without damaging your eyes.

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The ability to turn into an apple--but not be able to turn back.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!