32% Levitation.

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The power to die

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The power to induce vomiting after a crazy junk food spree.

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The power to forget what your superpower is

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the power to see through hills , but only in saskatchewan

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the ability to tell time without a watch

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The power of telepathy but only when you alone

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The power of turning into a crushed can right after you got into a car accident.

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The power to have superpowers from the beginning

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The power to be afraid of movies that are not scary

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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The power to read the bible, and then learn hypnosis, and look at the bible again... Moral: And they say hypnosis is worthless because it is just suggestions... the bible uses EVERY single trick in the book, and the bible`s teaching lead to the "holy" crusades (of kill murder and rape across the world, too many died to count), the bigotry, greater intolerance to different people, and just now (Bush before him) Obama is assuring his people that this war is "GODS WILL!" And seriously, if darkness is considered evil... then no wonder Captain America and his men did not hesitate to kill and enslave Captain Africa and his people a couple years ago... And its still going on, thanks lord (sarcasm, duh) Suggestion: Most powerful force in the universe, and it is invisible to boot... daaaang im powerful.

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The power to understand that if you type or read at this section, then it is probably because it means something to you... Moral: That is almost a superpower... I mean wow pointless makes a point which is pointless, and a pointless point with a point is... anyway I just divided by infinite loop. Cant say that is far away from zero which by itself is basically a circle... Damn im good! (just for that final line im gonna get thumbed down, its worth it though.

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The power to NOT think up a pointless superpower.

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The to ejaculate anytime but only when your mom appears in front of you.

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The ability to change races.

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The power to look at the sum, but only when it's night

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The ability to turn any escalator into a flight of stairs.

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The power to vomit pizza and root beer chunks at will.

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The power to see through anything except air.

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The power to teleport through open doors.

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The power to have diarrhea at any time

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The power to die when touching any form of light

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The power of hearing peoples conversations but only on topics related to Shrek.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!