The power to pick something up and stay the same but smell bad.

the power to lower my blood presure to dangerous levels

The ability to not have a super power.

The power to have all of your genes inherited from your parents

the power to fly for 2-6 seconds only when every apple product in arizona is at 100% battery level

The ability to never see CGI in any movie ever again

The power to live in lava, but only when your cold

The power to drown on land.

the power to fart your way to the moon

The ability to heal someone by trying to beat them to a pulp.

The power to get extreme diarrhea and projectile vomiting at aany time.

The power to lock open doors

the power to SHUT UP ALREADY!

The power to teleport yourself into a cell of a maximum security prison made from proto-adamantium, Damascus steel & Supermanium.

The power to vote in a republican democracy.

The power to produce fish eggs from your left eye

The power to vomit through your anus.

The power to shut me the F UCK UP! Moral: Ironically I have not said a single word for hours... so that would be impossible... Now, if you hear MY voice when you read this, then you are either psychic or psychotic, which is not that different if you ask me... Now.. if you hear YOUR voice inside your head, then YOU SHUT THE FRUCK UP AND GET LOST! :D :D :D :D :D :D (A MoralMan Original, now this one was pretty cool)

The power to uncontrollably laugh and point at every black guy you see

The power to know the name of every show while the title card is in front of you but only if you are holding cheap mango chutney

The power of drawing perfects dog dicks, but not dogs at all.

The power to quote Castlevania quotes all day... yelling them out on the streets! Moral: WHAT IS A MAN! People look at me and laugh... and moral man struts past... he has never been so awesome before... They see me rollin... they laughing... they lovin... and I hope nobody calls the ambulance because I am crazy... in love... I can see it in your eyes... I can see it in your smiiileeee...

The power to make all girls look pretty but only in your head and only if you drunk enough.

ability to swim like a frog with no legs

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!