The ability to transform yourself into a Turkey but only with a brain larger than the head of a turkey. Note: People will become happy if they eat you for christmas.

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The ability to trip on flat surfaces

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the power to have good enough grammar to phrase the fu**ing power you want to share without sounding like a retarded deaf 6 year old

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The power to absorb your hair into your body and the burp up a bottle of shampoo and you have to do this once a day or your eyes and ears and mouth and nose will liquify for a day.

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The power of magnetism! Aka being so magnetic that you have to live in a home completely made out of plastic, and cant go out because you either get hit by random flying frying pans and stuff literally attracted towards you, or even worse, you could get dragged towards a car in movement and become red paste. A guy with this power could not take it any more, so he bought an iron necklace and put it on... may he rest in peace...

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The power to unsee the unseen.

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The power to move 1 vein slightly to the left, but only if you moved to an apartment on the 29th of February (in any leap year).

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The power of 2 milliseconds of omnipotence followed by death.

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The power to use internet explorer at a moderate working speed

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The power to balance the light switch in the middle but only on the 4th try.

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the power to kiss your own ass

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the power to bleed to death from a paper cut.

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To be able to commit a sexual offense but never get away with it

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The power to create all the powers on this site

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The power to permanently shorten your own penis

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The ability to levitate birds

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The power to walk after about 6 months of age.

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the power to piss at will but only when your bladder is full

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The power to write pointless superpowers

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The power to dissasemble yourself, but not re-assemble yourself.

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Having the power to trap bugs with your manly body hair (chest hair, nose hair, moustache, armpit hair, pubic.......)

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The power to kill yourself.

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The power to digest corn.

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The power to watch Netflix instead of writing a thesis paper.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!