The power to cure cancer, in people already dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

the power to get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -39

The power to fly, but only in microgravity.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female

thumb_up thumb_down -39

The ability to see things only as their component atoms.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

The ability to get up early for school, but only on weekends.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

The ability to teleport, but only into solid stone.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

The ability to have glow stick bones (glow when broken)

thumb_up thumb_down -41

The power to see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch

thumb_up thumb_down -43

The power to speak a language only you can undeerstand

thumb_up thumb_down -43

The ability to turn into Jeff the Magic Cactus Baby, for a second, while you are sleeping.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

The power to control disabled people with your mind.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

The power to bring Magic: the Gathering cards to life, but only the land cards.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Uber Sensitive man, in terms of touch and emotion.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

the power to finish your plate of veggies when ever you like.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

The power of omniscience but it causes a near fatal heart attack every time you think.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

The power to transform into a baby only when around pedophiles.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

The power to become extremely strong unless there is someone stronger around you.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

The power to heal someone's injuries by killing them.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

The power to strap wheels of cheese to your own body without getting tired easily.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

The power to suck deez nuts

thumb_up thumb_down -47

The power to break your legs before hitting the ground after jumping off of heights

thumb_up thumb_down -47

The power to convert oxygen to carbon dioxide

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Invisibility when people aren't looking.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!