The power to jump super high, without landing ok.

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The power to cum extremely hard inside you`re mother.

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the ability to fly through the sky using the skin from your ballsack to glide to the ground

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The power to fart and smell like shit and not be shit.

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The power to pull your heart out from your chest.

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the power to troll people that are dead

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Captain Colorchart - instantly able to choose the right color for any room

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the power to have the most dangerous but most awesome power in the universe but not know how to use it

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The power to vomit a thoroughly blended mix of pickles, cheese, onions, caramel, lead paint, octopi, boiling water, vinyl, super glue, hot sulfur froth, and hand sanitizer.

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The power to be 10% more comfortable when sitting on a really uncomfortable couch.

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The power to be HUMAN

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The power to see through transparent objects.

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The power to eat food

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The power to fall from any height and stop in midair right before you hit the ground, then continue falling with 100x the velocity from before you stopped.

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The power to open shampoo and conditioner bottles by blinking.

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The power to have sex with anyone, but only if they are older than 65

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A power to fly only when you are standing on ground

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Death at will

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the power to give anyone an incurable disease

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The power to paint as if you were michelangelo but only if your painting sad clowns eating knives

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The power to make paper doves at above average speed but you can only make 4 a day.

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the power to pull a girl on www.hislag.com

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The power to strap a bomb on your chest, walk into a crowded area, and detonate it

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The power to teleport anywhere you want, but you need another guy with the same power.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!