the power to cook instant pasta in less than 1 min.

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the power to read whenever somebody is about to make a pun but only if youve already heard that pun

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THe power to whistle from your butthole but any time you do this your penis shrinks

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The power to eat gumbo with a fork.

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Taekwondo

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The power to easily dodge any bullets from any weapons ever... as long as the bullets are made of cheese.

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The power to make someone see your smile slightly whiter

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The power to play a flute with your ass

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The ability to troll a website like this. Basically, you do this. QWERTYUIOPASDFGHJKLZXCVBNM.

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The power to "dislike" things on Facebook.

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you can teleport anywhere in the world but every time you do you get punched by kimboslice in the face

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The power to become real life Captain Arabian. Example: Hey nice suit, does the A on your forehead stand for America? ALALALALALALALAH! *BOOOOOOM* Moral: Next time you see someone that looks like Captain America, you better run.

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The power to explode by yelling ALLAH FORGIVE MEEEEEEEEEE! (Bonus: you always appear on Al Jazeera when you blow yourself up)

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The power to make fish appear in pants.

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The power to pee standing up

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The power to have any power on this list but only 1 at any given point in time.

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The power to shoot pencils out of your mouth every 10 seconds

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THE POWER TO KNOW WHEN YOUR CAPS LOCK IS ON

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The Power to die at will

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the ability to fly through the sky using the skin from your ballsack to glide to the ground

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The power to tell a joke with no moral. Moral: There is no moral.

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The power to piss out of your ass and shit through your dick

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The power to incriminate yourself in a crime you didnt commit

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The ability to money into dog shit.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!