The power to read as fast as light when you can't read

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The power to return to life but only after being ritually buried 6ft underground

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vomitspit

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Being able to talk to fish, By turning into aquaman

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The ability to melt ice cubes with your bare hands.

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the ability to talk to animals, but only when discussing politics

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The power to lick your elbow.

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The ability to wear a backpack on your legs

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The ability to be in Rosy O'Donalds underwear drawer

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the power to make your nipples dissappear

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The power to move infinitely fast up spiral staircases, but the inability to go down them.

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The power to be Emperor of farmville but only in a full eclipse

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The power to manipulate time and space to urinate straight into your bladder, but only if you are extremely dehydrated.

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The power fuse yourself with a two lifeless jellyfish use their vital systems

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the power to become invisible when no one sees you including security cameras

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The power to shit someone elses pants.

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the ability to type at pointlesssuperpowers.com

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the power to sense the next viewing of the hit musical 'CATS'

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the power to unload massive amounts of jizz while taking a dump

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The power to attract flies and cockroaches

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The power to hear everyone masturbating in 1 km radius

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The power to laugh in the face of danger except for that time you walked face first into a glass door.

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Dust-mite communication. Attack my army of microscopic and fairly harmless beasts!

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The Ability to talk to girls, but only in your mind.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!